Cahlen, I will reply to your statements in two parts. First, love is not selfish. In fact, love is the most precious gift that one can give. And I am referring to the kissy, smoochy love. Not every relationship is comprised of love. Actually, very few are based on love, most on lust; especially for young people. I have been in a relationship for almost four years now and to be honest, love is very difficult. It isn't a warm, fuzzy feeling, it is a decision. Sure there are a lot of great moments, but there are some very tough ones as well. That is where love comes in. You can always stay with a person when things are great, everyone is all giggles. But when the tough times come, the deaths in the families, the arguments and nights of no sleep. That is where you have to reach down and find if you really love the person and support them. That is why love is not selfish. Many times love is not fun at all.

As for the other part, I used to want to be persued as well. That comes from a lack of confidence. It is hard to risk rejection, I know, I have been there. But in the long run, it is worth it. Not everyone is going to blatently show you that they want you. And the people that do will probably be the ones you don't want anyways! In response to Deja, the guy doesn't always have to take the initiative, but if you are interested in a person than go for it. What do you really have to loose? A little ego? If a girl says no, there is nothing lost. The only wierd feelings will be yours and for those, get over them. But don't say that you are not remotly interested in girls that don't show that they are interested in you. If you follow that self advice, you are going to be lonely for a long time.