I don't post here that often, but this is too delicious to resist. Cahlen, love = selfish? What you speak of is lust, and that goes away all too quickly. Love is something much different. When you think of your parents Cahlen, do you see selfishness in the way they treat you or each other? Love is the thing that comes after that initial attraction. It is sometimes not easy, and if it were entirely selfish, there would be no reason to be IN love.

On another note, of course you like to be pursued. I know of no one who does not (Any objections?) The problem is, someone has to show interest first. This is a chicken/egg scenario. You can't have the relationship without initial contact. I too have argued that it is unfortunate that in this society, men have been given the role of initiating relationships. But, that does not make the male side any harder than the female side of this. We experience rejection, just as girls do. Only, rejection to them, is when they are not asked out on a date. Think for a minute Cahlen, and ask yourself this: what if you didn't have to initiate, and only girls asked guys out. What if only girls you were not attracted to would ask you out? What if girls you didn't want were the ones that pursued you? The cold, hard truth is that if you do not pursue, you will end up alone, or with someone you didn't like in the first place. Don't rely on fate to provide you a mate. (I'm a lyrical gangsta...)

Trust me Cahlen, I speak from a position of experience when it comes to being pursued by da ladies. (Ask me sometime, I'll tell you the stories.) It's flattering, but it is not always the thing for which to hope.

I hope the above statement didn't sound too egotistical. (It wasn't meant to be.)

The short of which, is this: love is a commitment, from one person to another. It is not sex, it is not a "feeling." It is so much more than that.